The life-giving process of recovery includes learning to Lighten Up!

In ancient Egyptian mythology there is held a view that upon death a person’s soul travels to a dimension where their life is reviewed.  The essence of a person is taken before the god Anubis, who oversees a scale.  On one pan of the scale is a feather of truth.  Anubis then takes the astral heart of the recently deceased and weighs it in reference to the feather.  If the heart is lighter than a feather, the person’s soul is liberated.  If, however, the heart is heavier than a feather because it is filled with regrets, grievances, hostility, and remorse, the soul is sent back for recycling.

The message of this myth is that in our life prior to death, we must learn to lighten up!

Self-pity is ego-driven self-importance thinly disguised.  Holding on to gripes from the past depletes us of vital energy and prevents us from enjoying the precious gifts available in our present living.

LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO CARRY THE BURDEN OF A HEAVY HEART. 

In the face of significant life-changes due to either loss, or growth, grievances have a way of losing their importance.

Our emotions anchor the stories we tell about life and love.  Sometimes an emotion like anger, insecurity or frustration masks a deeper pain.  If we will courageously go into the pain, we can discover what causes it and then take steps to resolve the issue.  For example, anger might mask the pain of feeling powerless to make the world the way we desire it to be.  The pain comes from our resistance to accepting the truth of the way things are.

In grief counseling we encourage people to enter a process of adjustment to truth that ultimately includes deeper acceptance of reality.  Interestingly, when we courageously accept the truth that we have been resisting, the pain begins to dissipate.  Aligning oneself with the reality of things is a major step into greater emotional health.

Acceptance and forgiveness are prerequisites for inner peace.  Holding on to grievances, regrets, and resentments is a certain recipe for perpetual suffering.  Each of us, at some point, must consciously choose to relinquish the need to be always right and fully in control.

Our choice to accept and understand rather than judge and condemn allows peace to replace hostility.  Understanding fosters forgiveness, which dissolves anger and fertilizes positivity.  Positive living is the foundation of emotional freedom!

Forgiveness radiates from a heart that has courageously gone deeply into and then released pain, resentment, regret, disappointment, and guilt.  Forgiveness has the power to release constrictions in our heart that inhibit our ability to love.

Our hearts yearn for love.  We intuitively know that only love expands and beautifies our authentic self.

Action Steps:  How can I lighten up?

• Listen to my heart as it reveals the need for deeper acceptance and forgiveness.
• Take steps daily to clear any accumulating resentments and resistances.
• Accept full responsibility for my choices while not taking myself too seriously!

Forgiveness is the cash you need.

All the other kinds of silver really buy just strange things.

 

– Hafiz

Lyndon Duff Gorle, DMin, PhD ABD
Bereavement Manager/Grief Counselor/Chaplain
Reflections Hospice & Palliative Care, Mesa, Arizona